This is a love note to Musical directors who don't understand that when I say half a step down, I don't mean play around with the entire song:
"Excuse me, could you transpose this half a step down?"
"Oh here, lets try it an octave lower, and then an octave higher!"
"But..."
"SING IT NOW THATS YOUR CUE"
*strangled noises*
Yes, this was my evening. Rehearsal for six hours. Musical run through where the director said she thought the key was too high on my song. I was totally fine with changing it, like, half a step down. In fact, that's exactly what I asked the musical director who's a piano master. But, weirdly, he didn't seem to understand this. After the Vocal instructor asked him to do the same thing, he continued to play it, one octave up, one octave down.
Lets just say, this experience was not...remotely enjoyable.
love from hanhan =]
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
pwah
Hey internet. How's it going? I hope its all good. I'm really...I'm really nothing right now. and I don't like it very much. I'm not tired, well, I am but that not important. I'm not sad. Why should I be? I'm not ecstatic, I mean, I'm happy but you know. I'm not worried, or stressed, or smiley, or hyper, or insane. I'm just here. And I don't really want to share that feeling with anyone but this, which people will see anyway.
So nothing is bothering me. I don't even know why I'm writing this. It's not like anyone cares about this silly little blog. Nobody really reads it, and lately, all I do is complain about stupid things. But really, I am happy and it's pretty stupid of me to write about being mad or annoyed or pissed off or whatever.
Its just that, when you're in that mood when everything sucks and you don't know why, what are you going to take it out on? People have so many different methods of expressing their frustrations. Mine happens to be writing about it, it helps me get it out and not do (or say, knowing me) something stupid. Of course, I also like for it to be out there, which is probably not the best idea, but it works for me.
Anyways. I'm gonna go. Bye internet!
Love from hanhan =]
So nothing is bothering me. I don't even know why I'm writing this. It's not like anyone cares about this silly little blog. Nobody really reads it, and lately, all I do is complain about stupid things. But really, I am happy and it's pretty stupid of me to write about being mad or annoyed or pissed off or whatever.
Its just that, when you're in that mood when everything sucks and you don't know why, what are you going to take it out on? People have so many different methods of expressing their frustrations. Mine happens to be writing about it, it helps me get it out and not do (or say, knowing me) something stupid. Of course, I also like for it to be out there, which is probably not the best idea, but it works for me.
Anyways. I'm gonna go. Bye internet!
Love from hanhan =]
...blah. cold.
WHY is there an ICECREAM truck outside today? what makes it think its even allowed to do that? How dare it mock the fact that its cold. To put it in Shakespearian, how dare it flout the spring's insufficiencies! It's a cloudy grey day in the end of march, and some stupid ice cream person thinks its the summer. And why can't they be right!?
Please explain to me why it is so cold and dreary today? I'm very very tired of it. I want it to be warm again. Warm and nice and pretty out so I can go "play" outside in beautiful amazing weather! I think I'll go do that now. Oh wait. I live on Long Island. Our spring isn't warm. Or pretty. Or even "nice" most days. Its rainy. and wet. and cold. Okay. I'm going to stay inside today then. GO eat lemons LI. Or Chili peppers. so you warm up your COLDCOLDCOLD HEART!
Love from hanhan =]
Please explain to me why it is so cold and dreary today? I'm very very tired of it. I want it to be warm again. Warm and nice and pretty out so I can go "play" outside in beautiful amazing weather! I think I'll go do that now. Oh wait. I live on Long Island. Our spring isn't warm. Or pretty. Or even "nice" most days. Its rainy. and wet. and cold. Okay. I'm going to stay inside today then. GO eat lemons LI. Or Chili peppers. so you warm up your COLDCOLDCOLD HEART!
Love from hanhan =]
Saturday, March 27, 2010
still happy!
So today I've decided to be happy and nothing is going to change that. I woke up late, talked to the boy, and joked around about stupid things. Then I went shopping, and didn't let the fact that I am NOT a 2 bother me, and found some great stuff. Came home, Sat around with my brother and watched Doctor Who for the first time, which is such a weird show. I talked to the boy, and my two best friends. Honestly, can you guys see anything bad about this day? Because I can't. Now I get some time to myself to veg out and relax before my buddy's sweet sixteen tonight!
Ah! I'm so happy right now. I look ridiculous. I'm smiling at nothing. my family thinks I'm crazy. but that's cool because there isn't anything wrong. At all! I know you're all very jealous of my intense joy that comes for no reason. But that's cool because I'm gonna have a dessert party with my friend.
Basically, this post could simply continue on with good things, and I'd look like more insane than I already am, if that was even possible. Anyways, signing out. I'll probably be back with a rant later, but whatever. Toodles!
Love from hanhan =]
Ah! I'm so happy right now. I look ridiculous. I'm smiling at nothing. my family thinks I'm crazy. but that's cool because there isn't anything wrong. At all! I know you're all very jealous of my intense joy that comes for no reason. But that's cool because I'm gonna have a dessert party with my friend.
Basically, this post could simply continue on with good things, and I'd look like more insane than I already am, if that was even possible. Anyways, signing out. I'll probably be back with a rant later, but whatever. Toodles!
Love from hanhan =]
Friday, March 26, 2010
Happy post
What are you thankful for? These posts have been much too depressing, so I'm going to cheer them up. Here's a list of things I'm thankful for!
~Sweet family
~GREAT friends <3
~An amazing pair of besties
~an awesome boy
~Iced Coffee
~GOD
~Music
~This blog
~Catching up, slowly but surely in math!
~My new haircut
~KITTENS!
The list could go one forever, and I'd let it do just that, but it proved its point and now I can move on in life. Try to make a list of the top 10 (or 11!) things you're thankful for. It put me in a better mood, so maybe it'll do the same for you!
Love from hanhan =]
~Sweet family
~GREAT friends <3
~An amazing pair of besties
~an awesome boy
~Iced Coffee
~GOD
~Music
~This blog
~Catching up, slowly but surely in math!
~My new haircut
~KITTENS!
The list could go one forever, and I'd let it do just that, but it proved its point and now I can move on in life. Try to make a list of the top 10 (or 11!) things you're thankful for. It put me in a better mood, so maybe it'll do the same for you!
Love from hanhan =]
Thursday, March 25, 2010
meh.
I hate when you piss someone off by accident. You aren't even trying and suddenly they're annoyed and mad at you, and you don't want them to be mad because they mean a lot to you. Then suddenly, they're mad and you can't fix it, and then you feel bad because it's all your fault.
Then they realize that you're getting frustrated, and you work it out,but you can tell they're still kind of annoyed and you can't make it go away because you feel too down about making them mad to begin with. Then you realize that you had a good day with them, and you don't want to let this ruin it.
BUT, then they say something and you get annoyed but you're too afraid to say something because you don't want them to be mad at you after you just spent all that time working it out. So when they ask you what's wrong you say nothing, and ask them what's wrong and then you both force a laugh because you both just want anything to be good again.
Pwah. What a day.
Love from hanhan =]
Then they realize that you're getting frustrated, and you work it out,but you can tell they're still kind of annoyed and you can't make it go away because you feel too down about making them mad to begin with. Then you realize that you had a good day with them, and you don't want to let this ruin it.
BUT, then they say something and you get annoyed but you're too afraid to say something because you don't want them to be mad at you after you just spent all that time working it out. So when they ask you what's wrong you say nothing, and ask them what's wrong and then you both force a laugh because you both just want anything to be good again.
Pwah. What a day.
Love from hanhan =]
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
weird days =p
I really really hate those days when everything just seems weird. You talk to a bunch of people, but you don't really feel very "with" them. You aren't happy except for a few times, you aren't sad except for some small stuff. You don't want to be where you are, and when you go somewhere else you want to be back home.
Today is one of those days. Actually, this whole week has been full of those days. I just want to go away and not be with my people, as much as I love them. I want to DO something besides school and rehearsal and sleep. But all I want to do is go away again, which is a stupid thing to want. Anyone else feeling kinda weird today or is that just me?
Today is one of those days. Actually, this whole week has been full of those days. I just want to go away and not be with my people, as much as I love them. I want to DO something besides school and rehearsal and sleep. But all I want to do is go away again, which is a stupid thing to want. Anyone else feeling kinda weird today or is that just me?
Monday, March 22, 2010
rant
Okay. I just want to talk to you all about something. You know those "relationships" you see everywhere where the couple is so fake and they barely speak because they're too busy making out, but its okay because they're in "love"? Those are stupid. Love is so much bigger than just liking his amazing abs, or her big boobs. Physical attraction doesn't equal love. Sex doesn't equal love.
I feel like love is so much deeper than we give it credit for these days. It's not something shallow and on the surface. I mean, physical attraction is part of it, but you should like the person themselves. Love is, everything. You love the stupid things, the dumb mistakes, the annoying things, everything.
People who feel like their "relationships" are perfect all the time need to realise that they aren't in love. Love shouldn't always be easy because, lets face it, life isn't easy. When people are perfect and life is perfect, then your relationship can be easy and perfect. Its more than just talking to each other every day and having one of these conversations:
Him: Oh baby, I love you so much. I'm so glad I asked you out yesterday<333
Her: Oh babe, you light the stars in my sky!
Him: Yea Hun, that's what I do. Now come see me so we can makeout.
That's not what I want. Is that what you want? Something so fake and stupid so as to be considered laughable? Because today so many people have that, and call it "true love". These people end up used and hurt and left behind, because people get tired of that and move on to better things.
Okay so my stupid rant is over. Bye!
Love from hanhan =]
I feel like love is so much deeper than we give it credit for these days. It's not something shallow and on the surface. I mean, physical attraction is part of it, but you should like the person themselves. Love is, everything. You love the stupid things, the dumb mistakes, the annoying things, everything.
People who feel like their "relationships" are perfect all the time need to realise that they aren't in love. Love shouldn't always be easy because, lets face it, life isn't easy. When people are perfect and life is perfect, then your relationship can be easy and perfect. Its more than just talking to each other every day and having one of these conversations:
Him: Oh baby, I love you so much. I'm so glad I asked you out yesterday<333
Her: Oh babe, you light the stars in my sky!
Him: Yea Hun, that's what I do. Now come see me so we can makeout.
That's not what I want. Is that what you want? Something so fake and stupid so as to be considered laughable? Because today so many people have that, and call it "true love". These people end up used and hurt and left behind, because people get tired of that and move on to better things.
Okay so my stupid rant is over. Bye!
Love from hanhan =]
Writers block
WRITERS BLOCK! ITS HORRIBLE. I HATE IT. So...I'mma write you all a poem about it!
W: worst
R: randomly occuring
I: intensely annoying
T: terribly irritating
E: extremely obnoxious
R: REALLY BOTHERSOME
S: situation.
BLOCK.
End of the poem. How beautiful is that? Now I'm going to write something real.
Love from hanhan =]
W: worst
R: randomly occuring
I: intensely annoying
T: terribly irritating
E: extremely obnoxious
R: REALLY BOTHERSOME
S: situation.
BLOCK.
End of the poem. How beautiful is that? Now I'm going to write something real.
Love from hanhan =]
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Random boredom
Dear people:
It's 1 AM. I am so tired. I'm not going to sleep though, because I am a trooper. So me and Paul's hoodie are going to sit at the computer and write this. Paul's hoodie doesn't have a choice in the matter, and it really wants to go to sleep. But it's inanimate so it isn't allowed to, and it has to stay up and blog with me. So right now I...
See: They Keyboard because I have to look at the keys.
Hear: Taylor Swift, Love Story <3
Taste: toothpaste?
Smell:Nothing really.
Feel: a cut on my hand. Ow.
Since this is a blog and I can basically write whatever I want here, I feel the need to inform you all that you should be careful with what you do and what you give away. Some things you can't get back. Some things you'll regret.
I also feel the need to inform you that you shouldn't judge people on past mistakes. Me and Paul's hoodie don't feel the need to, so why should you? Since when are you perfect enough to decide who should get a second chance and who shouldn't? That's right. It's not your place to judge people.
Paul's hoodie would like to tell you that it has a pen in its pocket. It thinks that thats pretty cool. I'm really bored right now. This is all for tonight talk to you all later!
Love from hanhan =]
It's 1 AM. I am so tired. I'm not going to sleep though, because I am a trooper. So me and Paul's hoodie are going to sit at the computer and write this. Paul's hoodie doesn't have a choice in the matter, and it really wants to go to sleep. But it's inanimate so it isn't allowed to, and it has to stay up and blog with me. So right now I...
See: They Keyboard because I have to look at the keys.
Hear: Taylor Swift, Love Story <3
Taste: toothpaste?
Smell:Nothing really.
Feel: a cut on my hand. Ow.
Since this is a blog and I can basically write whatever I want here, I feel the need to inform you all that you should be careful with what you do and what you give away. Some things you can't get back. Some things you'll regret.
I also feel the need to inform you that you shouldn't judge people on past mistakes. Me and Paul's hoodie don't feel the need to, so why should you? Since when are you perfect enough to decide who should get a second chance and who shouldn't? That's right. It's not your place to judge people.
Paul's hoodie would like to tell you that it has a pen in its pocket. It thinks that thats pretty cool. I'm really bored right now. This is all for tonight talk to you all later!
Love from hanhan =]
asjfslgjh
The best thing in the entire world are those people that can brighten your day no matter what. Just a little thing they do can make you smile for hours and not hate the entire population of the earth. These people are the reason that right now, I'm happy and not miserable any more.
Today was a bad day. I graded math with my mother, was "taught" math with my father, and let me tell you, neither experience is remotely enjoyable. I left the house for Sunday mass, crying and miserable and hating everyone. Hate is not a comfortable emotion for me, it's exhausting and bothersome. So I was really glad when I came home, and one of my favorite people called me.
Sometimes the little things are what makes or breaks your day. Joking around with this kid, and then talking seriously later, just made me so happy. I'm not angry any more. I want to hug my parents and tell them I didn't mean to be so nasty. I want to hug everyone and tell them I love them.
Dear person, (You know who you are), Thank you for making my day so much better. You rock my socks =3
Love from hanhan =]
Today was a bad day. I graded math with my mother, was "taught" math with my father, and let me tell you, neither experience is remotely enjoyable. I left the house for Sunday mass, crying and miserable and hating everyone. Hate is not a comfortable emotion for me, it's exhausting and bothersome. So I was really glad when I came home, and one of my favorite people called me.
Sometimes the little things are what makes or breaks your day. Joking around with this kid, and then talking seriously later, just made me so happy. I'm not angry any more. I want to hug my parents and tell them I didn't mean to be so nasty. I want to hug everyone and tell them I love them.
Dear person, (You know who you are), Thank you for making my day so much better. You rock my socks =3
Love from hanhan =]
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Love query?
Here's a query. I tend to have a lot of these. And this one is probably not going to be brief, so hear me out, well, read me out actually. ANY WAY. The question of the day is, How do you react when someone you care about does something dumb? Because lately, this happened to me, and I don't quite know what exactly to do. So here are the following options you get to pick from!
1. Do you have to love the person and the thing they did, no matter what it is? 2. Do you love the person for the thing they did? 3. Do you just love the person despite the thing they did? 4.Do you love the person, and love the dumb thing too, because the person did it and you love them, and its part of who they are?
When I was little, my mom never wanted us to call our dog a "bad dog", no matter what he did. When I got a little older, I asked her why that was such a bad thing. She explained that overall, he was a good dog, who just did bad things. So, I started telling my dog that that was a bad thing to do.
I guess the point of my detour is to eliminate a few of the above options as I try to explain my idea of unconditional love. The second option is out, because you shouldn't love people FOR wrongdoings or mistakes alone. The Fourth option feels like its wrong too. I don't think you should have to love thing just because the one you love does it. I don't like smoking, but I love my friend who smokes. Comprehnde?
I think I just answered my own question right there. The answer to this query is number three. You love the person despite the thing. They're separate. Not the same. Smoking is not the friend, the friend is not smoking. I love how things make sense now. Any ways, I've decided what to do. I'm going to love them anyway.
Love from hanhan =]
1. Do you have to love the person and the thing they did, no matter what it is? 2. Do you love the person for the thing they did? 3. Do you just love the person despite the thing they did? 4.Do you love the person, and love the dumb thing too, because the person did it and you love them, and its part of who they are?
When I was little, my mom never wanted us to call our dog a "bad dog", no matter what he did. When I got a little older, I asked her why that was such a bad thing. She explained that overall, he was a good dog, who just did bad things. So, I started telling my dog that that was a bad thing to do.
I guess the point of my detour is to eliminate a few of the above options as I try to explain my idea of unconditional love. The second option is out, because you shouldn't love people FOR wrongdoings or mistakes alone. The Fourth option feels like its wrong too. I don't think you should have to love thing just because the one you love does it. I don't like smoking, but I love my friend who smokes. Comprehnde?
I think I just answered my own question right there. The answer to this query is number three. You love the person despite the thing. They're separate. Not the same. Smoking is not the friend, the friend is not smoking. I love how things make sense now. Any ways, I've decided what to do. I'm going to love them anyway.
Love from hanhan =]
Dear legs:
Dear Hannah's legs:
This is an apology for everything I put you through lately! I'm so sorry that on Friday you had to run 2 miles, when you can barely walk one mile. I'm sorry that even though you collapsed beneath me, the horrible taskmaster father pushed you on. My poor leggies, how did you do it? You are unconditioned for this painful torture. You even let me play dodge-ball yesterday, even after all that agony.
My dear darling legs, you didn't need to get this revenge on me. I'm sorry about yesterday. Maybe you could have found another way to get back at me, rather than burning every time I stand up or bend down? The soreness you inflicted today was NOT deserved! I was just trying to make you look better for short season! But no, you had to go be so sore I can barely walk downstairs. Thanks.
Just for this outrage legs, I'm going to dress you in PANTS tomorrow! Thats right. No sun for you ungrateful little...limbs. GOOD BYE.
Love from hanhan =]
This is an apology for everything I put you through lately! I'm so sorry that on Friday you had to run 2 miles, when you can barely walk one mile. I'm sorry that even though you collapsed beneath me, the horrible taskmaster father pushed you on. My poor leggies, how did you do it? You are unconditioned for this painful torture. You even let me play dodge-ball yesterday, even after all that agony.
My dear darling legs, you didn't need to get this revenge on me. I'm sorry about yesterday. Maybe you could have found another way to get back at me, rather than burning every time I stand up or bend down? The soreness you inflicted today was NOT deserved! I was just trying to make you look better for short season! But no, you had to go be so sore I can barely walk downstairs. Thanks.
Just for this outrage legs, I'm going to dress you in PANTS tomorrow! Thats right. No sun for you ungrateful little...limbs. GOOD BYE.
Love from hanhan =]
Rant about something
Last night a bunch of friends and I got to do one of my favourite things ever. Yup. We went to the seminary for Holy Hour/Dodgeball/Chilling. Now, the night would have been perfect if it wasn't for one thing. One of my friends decided it would be funny to be "emo" and say she was so "bipolar", and do the friggen slashings on her arm.
I might be overreacting, and I probably am, but that's NOT funny or cute or even remotely amusing. I also know this girl does NOT do that to herself. And I really wanted to punch her in the face when she did it because I know some people who's lives have been totally messed up by depression and cutting. Its not a laughing business at all, and its very stressful for everyone around them.
So, my dear people, if you are reading this, do me a favor? DON'T make fun of these problems. Nobody makes fun of the fact that you're a stupid insensitive tard do they? No, they don't even though when you make fun of this, it just makes you not only look rude and stupid, but it pisses off and effects people around you who may happen to actually suffer from it. So, watch what you say and grow up.
Rant fin.
Love from hanhan =]
I might be overreacting, and I probably am, but that's NOT funny or cute or even remotely amusing. I also know this girl does NOT do that to herself. And I really wanted to punch her in the face when she did it because I know some people who's lives have been totally messed up by depression and cutting. Its not a laughing business at all, and its very stressful for everyone around them.
So, my dear people, if you are reading this, do me a favor? DON'T make fun of these problems. Nobody makes fun of the fact that you're a stupid insensitive tard do they? No, they don't even though when you make fun of this, it just makes you not only look rude and stupid, but it pisses off and effects people around you who may happen to actually suffer from it. So, watch what you say and grow up.
Rant fin.
Love from hanhan =]
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
St. Patty's!
So its St. Patrick's day everyone. And, I don't feel the need to talk about drinking(because I've never done it), Ireland (because I'm not Irish), shamrocks or leprechauns. I do feel inclined to talk about the reason for the day. That's right my dears, St. Patty himself! Well, actually, I want to share something from him. It's my favorite lines from one of the most beautiful prayers written by our Saint of the day:
Christ with me, Christ before me,
Christ behind me, Christ within me,
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ at my right, Christ at my left,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks to me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.
Isn't that great? I think its perfect. If we would all pray for that, we could set the entire world on fire!
Okay, so thats what I wanted to share faith wise. So guess what else has been going on? You never will. I guess I'll just tell you, because I am after all, the omnipotent blogger, and you are just my faithful-ish readers =3 Okay so, My mom let my neighbours cat into our house thinking it was ours, yelled at us for letting it sit in the garage, then, as we all started giggling, she realised that it wasn't ours, hyperventilated, and made me put it back outside. Basically, it was really funny.
Love from hanhan =]
Christ with me, Christ before me,
Christ behind me, Christ within me,
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ at my right, Christ at my left,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks to me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.
Isn't that great? I think its perfect. If we would all pray for that, we could set the entire world on fire!
Okay, so thats what I wanted to share faith wise. So guess what else has been going on? You never will. I guess I'll just tell you, because I am after all, the omnipotent blogger, and you are just my faithful-ish readers =3 Okay so, My mom let my neighbours cat into our house thinking it was ours, yelled at us for letting it sit in the garage, then, as we all started giggling, she realised that it wasn't ours, hyperventilated, and made me put it back outside. Basically, it was really funny.
Love from hanhan =]
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
My dear people of the world: Here is an official note of the things about Facebook that bother me. I know you are all very interested, so I'm going to list them for you! Aren't you lucky? Yes yes, you are. Anyways, the list is as follows:
1. Typing your "g"'s as "q"'s is not cool. In fact. It's hugely annoying.
2. Writing text me in your status makes me feel like you have no friends. Don't do it.
3. Farmville. I tried it. I'm bored now. Don't clog up my newsfeed.
4. Always depressing statuses. Okay. Be happy. We're tired of it.
5. WALL TO WALL CONVOS THAT GO ON FOREVER.
6. Having a photo Album besides your pro pictures devoted to pictures of you and only you.
7. When people become a fan of so many things and it shows up in the newsfeed.
8. Just so you know, you don't love him. Don't write that or put up yesterdays date with little hearts.
9. Posting your formspring every hour will only bother people.
10. Profile music. when I click on your profile and I'm listening to music, I dislike scrambling to get to the pause button.
There's my quick little rant for you guys! Maybe I'll write more later tonight. But follow this list and you will NOT piss me off, and thus make the whole world a happier, and SAFER place!
Love from hanhan =]
1. Typing your "g"'s as "q"'s is not cool. In fact. It's hugely annoying.
2. Writing text me in your status makes me feel like you have no friends. Don't do it.
3. Farmville. I tried it. I'm bored now. Don't clog up my newsfeed.
4. Always depressing statuses. Okay. Be happy. We're tired of it.
5. WALL TO WALL CONVOS THAT GO ON FOREVER.
6. Having a photo Album besides your pro pictures devoted to pictures of you and only you.
7. When people become a fan of so many things and it shows up in the newsfeed.
8. Just so you know, you don't love him. Don't write that or put up yesterdays date with little hearts.
9. Posting your formspring every hour will only bother people.
10. Profile music. when I click on your profile and I'm listening to music, I dislike scrambling to get to the pause button.
There's my quick little rant for you guys! Maybe I'll write more later tonight. But follow this list and you will NOT piss me off, and thus make the whole world a happier, and SAFER place!
Love from hanhan =]
Monday, March 15, 2010
Cookie time!
Today was one of those days. You know, the type where you get the sheets ripped off you because you refuse to get up. The type where what you need to do doesn't get done because the library decides to be a butt and not call you even though its been a week since you asked them for the darned book. The type where you're lovely director decides to rewrite the whole script 6 weeks before the show. The type where you realise that you could potentially lose two weeks of summer to geometry.
Just when you start to think this day is the worst ever, a magical thing happens. You see the car being driven by your mother. You see her walk into the house holding a bunch of boxes. You open the door for her, and then run screaming around the house. You run the boxes as soon as she sets them down and GRAB your package. You rip open the package, just dying to see the contents. You've waited all year for these! Thats right! Your Girl Scout cookies have finally arrived!
Suddenly, your stolen sheets, the dumb library, The awful director and her new script, and being behind in geometry don't matter any more, and you taste the amazing bliss of a perfect, peanut butter Girl Scout cookie. Suddenly, your day seems better. Suddenly, your mood is lifted. then you realise something. The box had fifteen cookies to start with. And you just ate 5. Well, obviously, these are gonna last long =/
Love from hanhan=]
Just when you start to think this day is the worst ever, a magical thing happens. You see the car being driven by your mother. You see her walk into the house holding a bunch of boxes. You open the door for her, and then run screaming around the house. You run the boxes as soon as she sets them down and GRAB your package. You rip open the package, just dying to see the contents. You've waited all year for these! Thats right! Your Girl Scout cookies have finally arrived!
Suddenly, your stolen sheets, the dumb library, The awful director and her new script, and being behind in geometry don't matter any more, and you taste the amazing bliss of a perfect, peanut butter Girl Scout cookie. Suddenly, your day seems better. Suddenly, your mood is lifted. then you realise something. The box had fifteen cookies to start with. And you just ate 5. Well, obviously, these are gonna last long =/
Love from hanhan=]
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Retreat
So this weekend I had one of the best experiences I'll probably ever be blessed enough to have. Thats right guys, I went to a Lifeteen retreat. I met a lot of people and got close with some people I never thought I'd even talk too. I got to hear some super awesome guitar playing, Listen to some really inspiring people, learn a lot, think I made a difference, and get away to a place where things just seemed better.
One of the best parts about any retreat is Adoration in my opinion, and this one was no exception. There are a lot of "typical" reactions for Adoration. Some people cry, some people laugh uncontrollably, some people faint, the list goes on. I, am a crier. I am so pathetic its not even funny. Saturday night, they brought out the Host, and I curled up in a ball crying. I couldn't even begin to go into why I felt the need to cry so much, but I did. Lucky for me, at this retreat, the awesome people I had met where right there with me, and as cheesy as this sounds, I really felt the love.
A great thing that really distinguishes this retreat from other retreats was the envelopes. On Friday night, after we arrived, we all decorated envelopes with our names, and the leaders hung them up. Over the next day or so, we left each other notes saying how great the person was. No one could read the notes until the very end of the retreat. Let's just say, the little notes made more of a difference to some people than you ever thought they would or could. (Personal plan/idea. Compliment at least three people daily, and say you love them. See the difference you can make!)
Anyways, I don't really know what else to say except that this weekend was the best I've had for a really long time. And...Yea. Thats it for now. Maybe I'll write more about it when I'm not falling asleep =]
Love from hanhan =]
One of the best parts about any retreat is Adoration in my opinion, and this one was no exception. There are a lot of "typical" reactions for Adoration. Some people cry, some people laugh uncontrollably, some people faint, the list goes on. I, am a crier. I am so pathetic its not even funny. Saturday night, they brought out the Host, and I curled up in a ball crying. I couldn't even begin to go into why I felt the need to cry so much, but I did. Lucky for me, at this retreat, the awesome people I had met where right there with me, and as cheesy as this sounds, I really felt the love.
A great thing that really distinguishes this retreat from other retreats was the envelopes. On Friday night, after we arrived, we all decorated envelopes with our names, and the leaders hung them up. Over the next day or so, we left each other notes saying how great the person was. No one could read the notes until the very end of the retreat. Let's just say, the little notes made more of a difference to some people than you ever thought they would or could. (Personal plan/idea. Compliment at least three people daily, and say you love them. See the difference you can make!)
Anyways, I don't really know what else to say except that this weekend was the best I've had for a really long time. And...Yea. Thats it for now. Maybe I'll write more about it when I'm not falling asleep =]
Love from hanhan =]
Thursday, March 11, 2010
CREEP ALERT
Some people really shouldn't be allowed to speak. or type. or communicate. some people should be put in a box and kept seperate, lest they commit the crime of reproducing. You see, today a certain kid from my friends old elementry school started talking to me. We live in different states. I am, and will always be creeped out by this kid. I know I should give him a chance, but here's why I'm not:
*Picture a school gymnasium set up for a dance*
Creep asks me to dance while I'm dancing with this adorable kid who bought me flowers and everything. Creep grabs my hand. I push Creep away. Creep yells to the entire gym full of people: "SEE! SHE TOUCHED THIS HAND! I'LL NEVER WASH IT!" After the dance with the adorable kid, me and a friend go to get pizza. we are met by the Creep. The Creep continues to follow us until we go hide in a bathroom. He stands outside the door until we get a teacher.
*Picture a bowling alley*
" I will keep this little book of mazes forever, since you have given it to me!" Five years later, Creep still has this book.
*Picture FB chat 5 years later, present day.*
Creep spouts the most ridiculous pick up lines. I feel the need to leave the convo. ASAP. As I say goodbye, he cloeses with, "I love you. Bye." The Creep is NOT JOKING.
End of memory sequence.
SEE! SEE! CREEP! Thats why I feel we should shove him in a box. That'd amuse me. and he'd be in a box, not asking to hook-up with me, or go out with me. So, I petition you good people, to put all your least favorite creeps in boxes, so as to remain safe!
Love from hanhan =]
*Picture a school gymnasium set up for a dance*
Creep asks me to dance while I'm dancing with this adorable kid who bought me flowers and everything. Creep grabs my hand. I push Creep away. Creep yells to the entire gym full of people: "SEE! SHE TOUCHED THIS HAND! I'LL NEVER WASH IT!" After the dance with the adorable kid, me and a friend go to get pizza. we are met by the Creep. The Creep continues to follow us until we go hide in a bathroom. He stands outside the door until we get a teacher.
*Picture a bowling alley*
" I will keep this little book of mazes forever, since you have given it to me!" Five years later, Creep still has this book.
*Picture FB chat 5 years later, present day.*
Creep spouts the most ridiculous pick up lines. I feel the need to leave the convo. ASAP. As I say goodbye, he cloeses with, "I love you. Bye." The Creep is NOT JOKING.
End of memory sequence.
SEE! SEE! CREEP! Thats why I feel we should shove him in a box. That'd amuse me. and he'd be in a box, not asking to hook-up with me, or go out with me. So, I petition you good people, to put all your least favorite creeps in boxes, so as to remain safe!
Love from hanhan =]
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
A thought
1. Today, I woke up late. Today, I was too lazy to put on jeans until I had to leave. Today, My jeans are too tight. Today, my dog didn't cooperate on our walk. Today, I said some stuff I kind of wish I didn't say. Today, I felt sick half the day. Today, I accomplished very very little school. Today, my voice cracked in rehearsal and I sounded horrible.
2. Today, I slept in. Today, I wore comfy clothes, until I picked out a really cute outfit to leave in. Today, my jeans fit very well. Today, my dog gave me a run instead of a walk. Today, I expressed how I really felt. Today, I took a personal relaxing day. Today, I figured out a schedule for school to catch up, and gave myself the opportunity to improve. Today I practised extra in the car because my voice wasn't as good as it could be, and had a really good time.
This is my day from two different points of view. Pessimistic, and optimistic. I'm not perfect, but today I felt it necessary to make a really big effort to be optimistic. In one way, today was a total and utter failure. In another, I would see it as a wonderful day. Try to be an optimist for awhile, and see how your mood improves!
2. Today, I slept in. Today, I wore comfy clothes, until I picked out a really cute outfit to leave in. Today, my jeans fit very well. Today, my dog gave me a run instead of a walk. Today, I expressed how I really felt. Today, I took a personal relaxing day. Today, I figured out a schedule for school to catch up, and gave myself the opportunity to improve. Today I practised extra in the car because my voice wasn't as good as it could be, and had a really good time.
This is my day from two different points of view. Pessimistic, and optimistic. I'm not perfect, but today I felt it necessary to make a really big effort to be optimistic. In one way, today was a total and utter failure. In another, I would see it as a wonderful day. Try to be an optimist for awhile, and see how your mood improves!
A question
Here's a question for you people today. Its something that's often on my mind, something I tend to wonder about probably more than I should. The question for the day is, why do we go after people who don't want us? More importantly, why do we let those people hurt us, when they don't want anything to do with us?
I bring this up because it tends to happen a lot. One of my friends use to chase after this guy who had done nothing sweet for her. She would tell us these little things he had done, almost a year ago, and that's why she still loved him. In the end we all knew the real reason she felt the need to get him back. She felt as if she couldn't do any better. Now this friend has a new boyfriend who's sweet, and nice and everything she wished the other guy had been, and she's happy, because she learned to let go.
Now. I used to tell this friend all the bad things this guy had done, to try to help her get over him. Back before I had been hurt by guys, in my blissful innocence. Today though, I realise how stupid that was, and how much it must have hurt to be her. Because today I realised how much I miss him. I know I shouldn't. I mean, why would you miss someone who after three months dumped you on Facebook, and left you for someone who...was your total opposite?
Well now I'll return to the question. WHY? Why do we intentionally hurt ourselves and put ourselves through all the pain for someone who could care less about you? I used to tell my friends that the only people who should matter are the people you matter to. But right now, I'm fighting so hard to matter, to be missed, to be wanted back, by someone who is no good for me anyway.
One day maybe I'll learn. Maybe we'll all learn that we're worth so much better. But right now, my theme song's gonna have to be "Hopelessly Devoted" from GREASE.
I bring this up because it tends to happen a lot. One of my friends use to chase after this guy who had done nothing sweet for her. She would tell us these little things he had done, almost a year ago, and that's why she still loved him. In the end we all knew the real reason she felt the need to get him back. She felt as if she couldn't do any better. Now this friend has a new boyfriend who's sweet, and nice and everything she wished the other guy had been, and she's happy, because she learned to let go.
Now. I used to tell this friend all the bad things this guy had done, to try to help her get over him. Back before I had been hurt by guys, in my blissful innocence. Today though, I realise how stupid that was, and how much it must have hurt to be her. Because today I realised how much I miss him. I know I shouldn't. I mean, why would you miss someone who after three months dumped you on Facebook, and left you for someone who...was your total opposite?
Well now I'll return to the question. WHY? Why do we intentionally hurt ourselves and put ourselves through all the pain for someone who could care less about you? I used to tell my friends that the only people who should matter are the people you matter to. But right now, I'm fighting so hard to matter, to be missed, to be wanted back, by someone who is no good for me anyway.
One day maybe I'll learn. Maybe we'll all learn that we're worth so much better. But right now, my theme song's gonna have to be "Hopelessly Devoted" from GREASE.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Food is cool.
You know what is the best thing in the whole wide world? Obviously, you don't, or you wouldn't be reading this. So I will take the honor of telling you, my dear people. The best thing in this ENTIRE world, is to go for a nice long walk, and come home and eat potatoe chips. Not only do the potatoe chips absolutley negate whatever fatburning power the walk gave you, but they add on even more pounds!
Aren't you glad I told you that? Doesn't it make you feel like your life is fuller and better? Good. Want to know what the SECOND best thing in the ENTIRE WORLD is? Of course you do! So I'll tell you! the SECOND best thing in the entire world is when you put away those workout ruining chips and pull out a much healthier thing of raspberry yogurt, which you've been craving all day, and open it. You smell a weird smell, but you don't really pay attention because your little sisters have been sick all day. You go and lick thelittle metal lid thing and taste...Sour milk.
Yup. Best day ever. At least when it comes to food. I think I'll go make myself an egg. Thats safe right?
Love from hanhan =]
Aren't you glad I told you that? Doesn't it make you feel like your life is fuller and better? Good. Want to know what the SECOND best thing in the ENTIRE WORLD is? Of course you do! So I'll tell you! the SECOND best thing in the entire world is when you put away those workout ruining chips and pull out a much healthier thing of raspberry yogurt, which you've been craving all day, and open it. You smell a weird smell, but you don't really pay attention because your little sisters have been sick all day. You go and lick thelittle metal lid thing and taste...Sour milk.
Yup. Best day ever. At least when it comes to food. I think I'll go make myself an egg. Thats safe right?
Love from hanhan =]
Ahh geometry =p
One thing I believe I hate more than anything else would have to be Math. At the moment, the hate is mainly in one focused ball of energy piercing the screen of my other computer and settling into the pages of my online geometry textbook. Geometry. how I loathe you. If I could erase one thing in the entire world, it would be the fact that I have to learn math. Mainly geometry. mainly...writing proofs for triangles.
I like to think of myself as a creative person. I like things to be up for interpretation. I dislike these proofs that I have to memorize and write out. Picture this:
Me: Oh hay little library of math proofs! which one of you wants to be my guess for this worksheet?
LoMP(Library of Math Proofs): ME ME MEE! Please, use me as your guess because you don't understand the difference between us!
Me: Okay Math Proofs...I pick....Triangle Congruency Therom!
LoMP: You ALWAYS pick that one!
Me: Hey, relax. I like it.
Okay so, it doesnt really happen like that. But thts the process my mind likes to use to figure out my math. No wonder I'm failing.
Love from hanhan =]
I like to think of myself as a creative person. I like things to be up for interpretation. I dislike these proofs that I have to memorize and write out. Picture this:
Me: Oh hay little library of math proofs! which one of you wants to be my guess for this worksheet?
LoMP(Library of Math Proofs): ME ME MEE! Please, use me as your guess because you don't understand the difference between us!
Me: Okay Math Proofs...I pick....Triangle Congruency Therom!
LoMP: You ALWAYS pick that one!
Me: Hey, relax. I like it.
Okay so, it doesnt really happen like that. But thts the process my mind likes to use to figure out my math. No wonder I'm failing.
Love from hanhan =]
Monday, March 8, 2010
A goodbye to my jeans, and a strange story.
" I don't know if you can hear me, or if you're even there..."
Butttt...I'm going to tell you about the hole in the butt of my pants anyway! HA! you thought this was going to be serious. Well, guess again guys. So. Somehow, I managed to get a hole in the butt of my amazingly amazing and favourite Old Navy jeans. This makes me sadder than it should. But, because of this hole, I am one sad little puppy.
I don't know why I'm so attached to these jeans. I didn't have them for that long. They aren't super fashionable or expensive. They're just there. They make my butt look good, they aren't too tight, I can bend in them and run, and move comfortably. These jeans have been through a lot with me though, in the 6 months they've been with me.
Let's use these jeans as a metaphor for my life, because thats kind of what they've been. When I first bought these jeans, it was in preporation for a date. They were full of promise, just like the date. The Jeans came with me on the date, which I left with a boyfriend who was everything I could ask for, like the jeans were. The Jeans began to get worn in a little, and fit me in a way that made me happy, like my life at the time.
We all know good things must come to an end though. The Jeans got a hole in the knee. The boyfriend and I started to get weird. I fixed the hole, and the boyfriend and I were fine again. The fit in the jeans got more and more relaxed, and the hole got re-opened. The happy life I had had was a thing of the past. The boyfriend had left me, and Me and my jeans cuddled up on the couch with an oversized sweater, a blanket, and a bowl of icecream.
The Jeans have become my go to for days when I was feeling down. They've been my go to for days when I was going out. And now, when I'm feeling down, the butt rips, and something pokes me. The jeans are literally now a pain in the ass. Funny really. I guess, if I was like that, I would take this as a sign that the journey is over in this part of my life, and I must move on. Well. This chapter isn't over yet. But, goodbye Jeans, you will be missed.
Love from hanhan =]
Butttt...I'm going to tell you about the hole in the butt of my pants anyway! HA! you thought this was going to be serious. Well, guess again guys. So. Somehow, I managed to get a hole in the butt of my amazingly amazing and favourite Old Navy jeans. This makes me sadder than it should. But, because of this hole, I am one sad little puppy.
I don't know why I'm so attached to these jeans. I didn't have them for that long. They aren't super fashionable or expensive. They're just there. They make my butt look good, they aren't too tight, I can bend in them and run, and move comfortably. These jeans have been through a lot with me though, in the 6 months they've been with me.
Let's use these jeans as a metaphor for my life, because thats kind of what they've been. When I first bought these jeans, it was in preporation for a date. They were full of promise, just like the date. The Jeans came with me on the date, which I left with a boyfriend who was everything I could ask for, like the jeans were. The Jeans began to get worn in a little, and fit me in a way that made me happy, like my life at the time.
We all know good things must come to an end though. The Jeans got a hole in the knee. The boyfriend and I started to get weird. I fixed the hole, and the boyfriend and I were fine again. The fit in the jeans got more and more relaxed, and the hole got re-opened. The happy life I had had was a thing of the past. The boyfriend had left me, and Me and my jeans cuddled up on the couch with an oversized sweater, a blanket, and a bowl of icecream.
The Jeans have become my go to for days when I was feeling down. They've been my go to for days when I was going out. And now, when I'm feeling down, the butt rips, and something pokes me. The jeans are literally now a pain in the ass. Funny really. I guess, if I was like that, I would take this as a sign that the journey is over in this part of my life, and I must move on. Well. This chapter isn't over yet. But, goodbye Jeans, you will be missed.
Love from hanhan =]
The fairytale game
When I was little I used to play all sorts of games with myself. I'd go through days pretending to be a character from a fairytale. It was a lot of fun, imagining the happy endings were happening to me. I liked having the certainty that as long as I was pretending to be a princess, a handsome prince would come get me at the end of the day, and I would live happily ever after in his arms.
I still play these games with myself. I try to be perfect some days, and carry myself like I'm worth more than I am, dress in clothes that look good on me, do my hair and makeup. I would like to say that this is how to get princes, just walk around all dolled up, but that would be lying. I get some cars to honk at me, and some looks, but never the prince coming to sweep me off my feet.
Why can't I find a prince? What makes me so different from the fairytales, what makes me different from the other girls? I mean, its not like I've always been looking for a prince. I had one once. So where does one go to find another?
The answer to that question I will gladly share with you once I find it out. Only thing is, right now, I dont have the patience to wait. Because I want my prince now. I'm lonely now. I wish he would hurry up and come. That's not to say he's not out there somehwere, but, handsome prince, if you're reading this, Come find me soon?
Love from hanhan =]
I still play these games with myself. I try to be perfect some days, and carry myself like I'm worth more than I am, dress in clothes that look good on me, do my hair and makeup. I would like to say that this is how to get princes, just walk around all dolled up, but that would be lying. I get some cars to honk at me, and some looks, but never the prince coming to sweep me off my feet.
Why can't I find a prince? What makes me so different from the fairytales, what makes me different from the other girls? I mean, its not like I've always been looking for a prince. I had one once. So where does one go to find another?
The answer to that question I will gladly share with you once I find it out. Only thing is, right now, I dont have the patience to wait. Because I want my prince now. I'm lonely now. I wish he would hurry up and come. That's not to say he's not out there somehwere, but, handsome prince, if you're reading this, Come find me soon?
Love from hanhan =]
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